And Then My Schedule Got Crazy

Many, many things have happened since I last wrote. Here they are, nice and neat:

-The weekend: work.  Ridiculous. Of course, I’m not complaining- I’m jazzed to be getting so many shifts so early, especially since last summer, at my old job, I generally worked a grand total of twice a week. While days off are nice, I’d like to actually make some money. So I’m not complaining when I tell you that I worked four shifts in three days. Sunday was my first ever double shift as a waitress, and though I could no longer feel my legs by the end, I am happy to announce that I am getting better at being a waitress. Especially during my second shift on Sunday, I was feeling pretty good about myself. I was actually given the choice to go home after my first shift, but I was already prepared to work an additional eight hours, and let’s face it, I need the money. So I stayed, and good thing, too, since my manager came running over to me fifteen minutes into people boarding and said, “We had a little mix-up and there’s an additional table of four next to your two-top [table of two.] Just take care of them, okay?” Thankfully, in addition to my other awesome tables, this table held two dads and their sons celebrating Father’s Day and they were super cute and nice, so no complaints.

-The weekend: family party. After work on Saturday, I took the train about fifty minutes to the town where my aunt, uncle, and cousins live and my mom picked me up. I was really glad to be able to go to this get-together, since we don’t see the extended family a ton, and also it was the day before Father’s Day and I hadn’t seen my dad for… I don’t even know how long. I know he wasn’t there the day I moved out. So that was nice.

Pretty much every family member that was nearby was at the party- my parents, my sister, two uncles, two aunts, my grandfather, and four cousins. Times with this family are always really fun, and Saturday was no exception. As my Aunt Diane said, we’re a family that genuinely enjoys each other’s company, and besides getting into a solidarity rant with my sister and cousin Amanda about our unmarried status, the evening was host to such quotable gems as “I’m hurt on a genetic level.” We also ceremoniously burnt a bag of old bagels, because we know how to party.

It was very interesting to notice how my family speaks to me differently now that I’ve graduated/moved out/gotten a job. My family has always believed in speaking to children like people, as opposed to using baby talk, but even after a life of being spoken to like an intelligent human being, I’ve noticed that my interactions with everyone were a little different. It’s hard to describe how exactly, but it was definitely a good thing. Even my conversations with my mom were different than usual. I think I like it.

-Things I realized at work: while I am liking my job so far, there are some things that I don’t like. These things have very little to do with my actual job, which is why I feel I can rant about them.

  • Ties. I hate wearing one. Maybe this is just because I’m a girl and so haven’t ever sported a tie (though apparently I’m alone in this. When I complained about this to my friend Nicole, she said, “You’ve never worn a tie?” I guess I missed that fashion memo. Then again, I missed most fashion memos until I got to college.) But I really hate wearing one. First of all, I don’t know how to tie it, and while it’s simple enough to have someone tie it for me once and just loosen it and leave it tied for the next shift, they do eventually need to be retied so they don’t look messy. Also, the reason I never wore a tie as a fashion statement is because high-necked shirts (with which ties are usually worn) do not compliment my figure. Sadly, I have to wear both for work. Bleh. Also, my stupid tie keeps getting stained and stuck on stuff and no freaking way am I paying to have it dry-cleaned.
  • Balloons. Oh my God. I hate them so much. When we have large groups that take up more than one table, we tie a balloon on one of the end chairs on each table. I am always filled with dread when I see them being fastened to a chair leg, because I know that that means the whole shift will consist of me swerving around or getting tangled in balloons, which is super awkward because someone is always sitting in those chairs.
  • I Need to Drink All the Things. Remember when I was lamenting that I didn’t drink alcohol, certain that it would solve all my serving problems if I knew the difference between a merlot and a cabernet? Yeah, no. No, because it’s not just the alcohol that’s tripping me up. It’s pretty much ALL the drinks. Turns out, I’m weirder than I thought. In addition to not being a beer/wine/rum/etc. drinker, I also don’t drink coffee or iced tea. And all the different versions of each of those look EXACTLY THE SAME. Also, on Friday, one of the grumpy old ladies at a table full of grumpy old ladies asked me if she could have an iced coffee. The woman next to her thought that sounded like the best idea ever and asked for one too. And since I detest coffee, I had no idea how an iced coffee was made. I mean, yeah, it’s sort of self-explanatory: you put the ice in the coffee, but there’s a reason that businesses have machines for these kinds of things. It’s really hard to figure out the coffee-to-ice-cube ratio in the glasses we use, especially when you’re not a coffee drinker and the old lady is lecturing you on what it should look like. Long story short, I’m sure they left thinking I was the stupidest they’d ever met and I hate making iced coffee.
  • The Song I Thought Was a Hazing Ritual: During my final shift this weekend, my manager came over and said, “Will you go do bye-bye line.” “Sure,” I said, then, “What is that?” A few minutes later, I found myself standing outside the ship with co-workers Tori and Angela. Tori explained to Angela (who is new-ish) and me that as the guests are coming off the ship, we sing the same four lines of a song and clap along. The song is a convoluted, my-job-specific version of a popular tune, and it’s kind of ridiculous, to the point where I actually thought that Tori was just pulling our legs. I was sure that if Angela and I did this, it would be The Story for two weeks about how Tori got the new girls to sing the hazing song and hahahaha wasn’t it funny? I refused to be the butt of a joke, so when passengers started coming off the ship, I waited to see if Tori would start singing. She did, and so Angela and I joined in. After a good amount of people had come off the ship, I suddenly saw our manager running toward us. I knew what was going to happen. She was going to come over and ask Tori what she was doing and why the old employees felt the need to make the new people go through. So I was pretty surprised when she stood in line across from us and joined in. So apparently it’s not a hazing ritual- it’s what is actually done.
  • My shoes. I finally got them from the office yesterday. The box looks like it’s been through a war, and my shoes are the hugest, ugliest things I have ever seen. I don’t care if they’re non- slip. I abhor them with every fiber of my being. Big clunky shoes are a huge pet peeve of mine.

-The show. Yesterday I wandered around the city all day, picking up my shoes and going to various appointments, and ended the day with seeing one of my friends’ shows. It was a solo show, and though I didn’t have much interest in the subject matter, I wanted to support my friend. And WOW,  was he amazing. He played so many characters and the show was scary and gross and well-written (he did the adaptation) and just great. I think it must be so hard to have such amazing comedic timing when you’re doing both sides of the conversation, but he handled it perfectly. It was a great way to finish off the day.

Tomorrow I have another solo rehearsal with my manager- I hope it goes better than last time. Either way, you know I’ll be reporting on it.

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